TMP-- I'm pissed... that federal judge says I can't eliminate the Food Stamps Program.
DOC-- Well, eliminating food stamps could have some really bad consequences.
TMP-- Really...like what?
DOC-- 700,000 people could starve.
TMP-- Numbers shnumbers...just tell me the bad consequences.
I wonder how they taste.
DOC -- How what tastes?
TMP-- The food stamps, putz. They can't be as good as a Whopper. But a lot of people are eating them so they must be good. I gotta taste them.
DOC-- Mr. President these are stamps...stamps!
TMP-- Jesus, did you really go to medical school... they're FOOD stamps...ever hear of food?
DOC-- They have zero nutritional value...zip, zilch, zero.
TMP-- Just like a Whopper. Hand me the phone.
Chef-- How can I help Mr President?
TMP-- Send me up 9 dozen food stamps...3 pork, 3 beef and 3 shrimp.
Chef-- Not sure I heard you, Mr President. Sounded like you said you want 9 dozen food stamps.
TMP-- You got it.... don't forget the ketchup and relish, and lots of hot sauce.
DOC-- Mr President, the 700,000 people getting food stamps don't eat them.
TMP-- That's why they look like scarecrows.... not my fault, right?
DOC-- Nothing is your fault.
TMP-- Hey...maybe I replace MAGA with Not My Fault. I can hear the chant... 15,000
chanting Not Your Fault...holy shit I really love it. It's perfect for the bullshit blame
they are throwing at me every day for that fuckin' virus. Picture me out there in front
of the Trumpers.... I shout- THEY HAD NO VENTILATORS and the crowd shouts back-
NOT YOUR FAULT.... I shout- THEY HAD NO MASKS and they shout back-
NOT YOUR FAULT.... and I keep going through all the stuff the doctors and nurses didn't get
and the crowd keeps shouting-- NOT YOUR FAULT, and finally I shout loud as hell--
8 MILLION DEAD and they scream like wild banshees and just keep screaming . . .
NOT YOUR FAULT....NOT YOUR FAULT. Can you imagine it??
DOC-- I really and truly wish I could, but, it's simply unimaginable.
Brilliant!
ReplyDelete